Not Normal
by Ivan the Bear
Summary: Please, God. Save us. TalaxBryan IanxSpencer
1. Prologue

**A/N: **okay! So I've had some really bad writers block lately and so im going to start another side story to maybe help get the idea flowing.

**Warnings**: Shounen Ai/Angst

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Beyblade

**Not Normal - Prologue**

It's not normal. It hasn't been and will **never **be normal. He will never be normal, and maybe that's why I feel the way I do about him, but this unnatural, oh so not normal thing is almost….**too** abnormal. It isn't something to be expected of him. It isn't the first thing that pops into your head when you glance at him or even if you take a good long look. No. unless you sit in front of him for hours and stare into those pretty eyes you will never, ever see this not so normal thing. This not so normal fact about him. But I….I do stare into those eyes for hours. I watch that body during the hours of relentless training we're put through. I know the weight that is on his shoulders and I've seen the way it affects him. The weight of the world, the power of harsh words pounding down on him, the voice in his head and his slowly evaporating sanity. If anyone else could look inside his mind, if anyone else could watch him sleep at night and watch his body writhe in terror from nightmares, if anyone else knew him like I do they'd leave.

Up and leave.

If I was anyone else I probably would have left. But the fact stands that I am me, I do hear his thoughts and I do watch him sleep and I am the one who holds him when he wakes up screaming. I am the one who sits by and worries myself half to death over him and his habits. And now, I am the one who must live with the undying fact that I am in love with a skeleton.

A simple shell. Skin and bones he'll soon be.

It is not normal. It will never be normal. He and I will never be normal. But it's why we understand each other best. Better than anyone. With or without words. Day or night. I know what he feels, what he thinks. And he knows my worries and my thoughts. In a crazy way we are one.

The wolf and the falcon.

Boris yells for Bryan to get his lazy ass to the training room. I wince.

One day I want to tell Boris. I want to tell him everything. I want him to see the damage his words have done.

Standing, I shake my baby bear from his sleep. He hardly gets any these days. Taking his hand, I help him up. _Oh how light he's gotten._

"You have to go train. Boris is pissed." I said, letting him go once he was on his feet. With a nod but no words, Bryan started off for today's nightmare. I watched him walk away, sighing.

_One day._

**TBC….**

**A/N: um…not much to say. So please read and review!**


	2. Chapter 1

**A/N: **I'm a little surprised people have taken a shine to this story already :O it makes me really happy. Thank you guys so much for reviewing

Also, if you guys could please go to my profile and vote on the poll I would absolutely love that.

**Warnings: **Shounen-Ai/Angst

**Couples: **TalaxBryan. IanxSpencer.

**Disclaimer**: I do not own Beyblade or any of it's characters

**Not Normal - Chapter 1**

"Is it just me or is Bryan paler than normal?" Ian asked me as he pulled off his goggles to get ready for bed. I thought back to my teammate today. The way he looked during training. Maybe he was paler. Maybe Ian is just loosing it. I shrugged, tugging my pajama shirt on as I yawned.

"Dunno. But I really doubt it. I don't think he can get any whiter." Ian snickered at my comment, climbing onto his bed.

"I don't either. Guess im just seeing things." he sighed, stretching out on his bed. Trying to ignore the slight line of midriff I was flashed as his night shirt rode up, I climbed onto my own bed.

"Yeah. Goodnight, Ian."

"Night, Spencer."

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Another night. Another bout of uncontrollable shivers. Bryan curled up tighter in his bed, trying to get warmer so he could fall asleep. He had found out that when he was freezing, sleep just couldn't seem to claim him. Eyes already adjusted to the dark, Bryan peaked over at the bed across the small room. Curled up under a mountain of blankets was his lover, Tala. _'he looks so warm' _the falcons mind cooed _'you should see if he'll come cuddle'_. Bryan nodded to himself, pulling his knees up to his chest.

"T-t-tala?" he whispered.

Silence.

Bryan whimpered, shivering and shaking as the blankets did little to fight off the coldness of the room.

"Bry?" Tala mumbled, voice thick with sleep as he sat up, rubbing his eyes. Noticing the state his teammate and boyfriend was in, the redhead immediately crawled out of his bed, grabbed his blankets and went to Bryans aid. Stretching out his blankets over Bryans bed, Tala climbed in instantly feeling a pair of small, frail hands grabbing at the front of his night shirt. Wrapping his arms around the human popsicle, Tala snuggled up to the boy, holding him close.

Bryan sighed, content with the sudden rush of warmth that surrounded him.

"Thanks." he whispered, burying his face in the wolfs chest. Offering a blind smile, Tala nuzzled his face into Bryans hair, kissing the top of his head in a silent _'you're welcome'_

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

_**Fat.**_

_**Lazy.**_

_**Worthless.**_

_**Good-for-nothing.**_

_**Ugly.**_

_**Disgusting.**_

_**Weak.**_

_**Monster.**_

_**Beast.**_

_**Frightening.**_

_**Unwanted.**_

If my memory wasn't such shit I'm sure the list would go on. Those words above are the daily mind fuck for Bryan. Boris's day just isn't complete unless he throws a whole shit of insults at him. Sometimes I wonder if Boris knows his words actually hurt. One wouldn't think that such a mindless and weak thing as insults could affect someone like Bryan. Someone who is regarded by many as fearless and strong. But that's bullshit. Pure and utter bullshit.

Those words have more effect on Bryan **because **everyone expects him to be strong.

Those words have created the Bryan that I know today.

The weak, depressed, skeleton often tucked away under a pile of clothes and a fluffy mop of soft lavender hair.

The words have made him into a sick nothing.

Ahhh but he's my sick nothing.

Watching him try to discreetly throw away an entire plate full of food , I retreated for the bathroom.

_I love him._

But sometimes he makes me sick.

**TBC…**

**A/N: =D criticism? Comments? Randomness? Please read and review!**


	3. Chapter 2

**A/N**: ahem…. I LOVE YOU GUYS 8'D //is in a very lovey mood. My inspiration comes and goes quite frequently but whenever I re-read my reviews (for not only this story but every other one) I always get UBER inspired to write, even if im super tired. You guys win.

**Annoying talking animal::: **; _ ; … you make me so happy I could cry

**GabZ::: **is that even possible?!~ xD thank you for your review!!

**Awed-Reader::: **eheh I dunno. I guess because for the longest time I either got only flames or no review at all…and now I have FANS 8'D it's EXCITING and THRILLING and LIFE CHANGING! LIKE YOU, M'KAY!!?? :D

**Warnings: **shounen-ai/angst/swearing

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Beyblade or any of its characters

**Not Normal - Chapter 2**

"_AGHH!"_

The abbey. This place that we live in. This living nightmare that we will never wake up from. It's run by a man named Boris. If you were to meet him for the first time, nothing about him would intimidate you. No alarms would suddenly go off in your head (unless you're paranoid that everyone is out to rape you, in which case a lot of alarms will go off in your head). He seems like a fairly normal guy who runs a fairly normal boarding home. But then you meet Boris…you take one step inside the abbey doors. You see the people…us. And it doesn't take long for you to realize that this is not normal. This place is not normal.

"_S-STOP!"_

The abbey. It's filled with bladers like us. Taken in at a very young age we were very impressionable. We didn't know any better. And if Boris continues to have his way, we will **never **know any better. We are raised and trained to be the best goddamn bladers in the world. Hours and hours of training every day of the week. If you succeed, maybe you'll get to go to bed early. If you fail? ….lets just say, you don't want to fail. My Bryan knows this better than anyone.

"_PLEASE! STOP IT!"_

Can you hear it? What I hear as it I sit on my bed, using every fiber of my being to resist going to him? Those screams of agony. The pleas. Boris ignores them all. Why? Because Bryan deserves this punishment. He failed…again. One failure equals a bad enough punishment. But if you fail repeatedly? Hell hath no furry like an angry Boris and the world knows no pain like what my heart goes through whenever this happens.

"_I WON'T FAIL AGAIN! I..I WON'T!"_

He'll plead. He'll promise. But in the end, this is Boris's game.

**We can't win.**

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

The day is done. Training has finished but instead of going to bed, I find myself sitting in a rather small room filled with nothing but two couches and two only semi-comfortable chairs. It's tradition. Ritual. A promise? Something like that. Whenever one of us gets…punished badly enough, we stay up in our own attempts to comfort. To help. To try and keep some sanity alive.

Sitting cross legged on one of the couches next to Spencer, I watch Tala, the ever so "cold hearted" one as he cradles a beaten and brutally raped Bryan in his arms. Pale. Scratched. Scraped. Bruised. _Is it just me again…am I seeing things…or is he dying before us? _Words are not exchanged for they are not necessary. Words won't convey what any of us are feeling. It won't show the anger, the sadness, the pity. The only useful words now are soft _'I love you's _and _'you're safe now's_ coming like a whispering wind from Tala as he tries his best to help.

He's a cold hearted jackass.

He really is.

But when it comes to Bryan…well, he's Tala's one weakness. If Boris knew that he'd eat that shit up and use it against them.

Exhausted, I leaned against Spencer hoping he wouldn't mind me using him as a pillow. We all need a little comfort now and then. Putting his arm around me, he allows me to lean against him. Letting out a tired yawn, I allowed myself to drift off.

My last thoughts were of them and how I wish there was something I could do.

_Anything._

_**Please, God. Save us**_**.**

**TBC…**

**A/N: I hope that was worth the…3 day wait o.O Please read and review**


	4. Chapter 3

**A/N:** so I don't know if I mentioned this before, but for about 5 days I may not update because my mom is taking her laptop with her when she goes to Kentucky tomorrow. Right now im at school, chillin in the art room, and I have decided to take advantage of this opportunity. So here is an update =D

**Annoying talking animal**::: D: I suppose that does mean im doing something right.

**FuriousFanny:::** oddly I do understand that o.O Bryan is your favorite character?! Mine too! My plots usually aren't TOO obvious ^_^ so I hope it stays that way so this isn't ruined for you. Thank you so much for reviewing!

**Warnings**: Shounen-Ai/Angst

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Beyblade or any of its characters but I do own this idea.

**Not Normal – Chapter 3**

"Ian?"

Spencer lightly poked the boy curled up against his side, dead to the world in his sleep. Getting no reply, not even some movement in return, Spencer decided to let Ian sleep. '_he's so tired these days. If he doesn't watch it he'll start getting punished like Bryan'_. That very thought made the blond winced, shivering at the very thought of the smaller boy by his side having to go through the torture again. Buried against whatever was shivering, Ian snuggled up against the warm entity, clinging to it in his sleep; completely unaware to the waking world.

The sudden clinging brought Spencer's attention back to reality. Glancing down, he smiled softly.

'_if I could have one wish, I would wish for him to be free from this hell. From boris'_

With his mind suddenly filled with all-too-familiar depressing feelings; Spencer held Ian tighter.

'_no. boris will never touch you again. Not if I can help it.'_

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

At this point in my life there are very few things I am thankful for. I am thankful for Tala; that he lives. That he breathes. That he loves me. I am thankful for my team; that I have one. They're so much like the family I never had. And last…I am thankful that I am here. Most people probably wouldn't be thankful to be taken away from their home at a young age, get locked up in hell and then be tortured all their life. But in what im sure is a very sick way, I am thankful. Even as I lay here, wherever here may be, curled up on my good side after a day of torture and a night of terrors…I am thankful. Not quite happy. But thankful nonetheless.

I'm sure it doesn't seem like it to anyone.

_But I am._

If I hadn't been taken from my home and brought here, I never would have met Tala, Ian and Spencer. I never would have gotten the opportunity to become stronger. I never would have been given the chance to fall in love or make friends that actually understand me most of the time. Sure, I'm sick now. I went from spending all those years getting stronger, to these past few months getting weaker. I glance in the only reflective surface in the dorm room I share with Tala and I now can see the changes I've caused. _Paler. Thinner. Weaker._

**Weaker…**

'_you're weak! Nothing! You worthless piece of shit!'_

I know.

I'm not good for anything these days.

I've known for quite a while. I will never matter to anyone. I'm even starting to doubt that I mean something to Tala….

"NO!" I sat up, ignoring the pain radiating from every abused inch of my body. "No..." I need to stop listening to my mind. He loves me. He does. I mean everything to him. I do. Grabbing my injured side, I tried so hard not to cry.

'_Pathetic. Weak'_

'_you're right. I am' _I bit my lip, fighting so hard but…

"Bry?" a worried voice followed by the beautiful face I've come to known so well enters the room. Sitting awkwardly on my bed, hunched over…the tears just came. And I can't seem to stop them anymore.

_I'm thankful._

But that doesn't mean I'm happy.

**TBC….**

**A/N: another chapter for my lovelies! Please read and review!!**


	5. Chapter 4

**A/N:** INSERT COOL A/N HERE!! xD lol anyway. Im using the lyrics idea Awed-Reader gave me to help combat writers block! I used it for ACW so now im going to use it here ALSOOOOO i am currently writting the next chapter for A Careless Whisper, soooo HAVE PATIENCE AND LOVE ME =D

**Annoying talking animal:::** =D

**FuriousFanny:::** your lack of words is a good thing yes? x Dim glad you like it so far

**Awed-Reader:::** o.O why were your kitties in jail?

**Warnings**: Shounen-Ai/Angst

**Disclaimer**: I do not own Beyblade or any of its characters. I also do not own The Offspring.

**Not Normal – Chapter 4**

_Show me how to lie. You're getting better all the time_

I'm oh so so close to landing a punch between his eyes. I don't give a damn who he is, nobody lays a fucking finger on Ian. And I fucking mean nobody. Just because I don't have the metaphorical balls to admit my feelings to Ian's face, doesn't mean I don't have the balls to beat the shit out of Boris. He can sick his bullies on me, he can shoot me in the head and leave me to be a fucking vegetable for the rest of my life. I don't fucking care. But I will never allow a repeat of today.

_And turning all against the one is an art that's hard to teach_

Bryan and Tala were beybattling and very obviously Bryan was failing miserably. Being the ever fucking sweetheart that he is, Ian told me he was really worried for Bryan whose health really seems to have been deteriorating lately _(we're not stupid. We've noticed)._ Then Boris came out of who the fuck knows where and slammed Ian against the wall for distracting the others from their battle. You don't know how much self control I had to use to NOT start a fight.

_Another clever word sets off an unsuspecting herd_

Ian's currently in the tiny, inefficient infirmary located at the opposite end of the abbey_ (really, it's very inconvenient)._ I want to go see him but at the moment my services are needed elsewhere. Besides noticing Ian's talking, Boris apparently noticed Bryan's failure during his and Talas battle because Tala is sitting here a few feet from me trying with all his might not to go to the source of the pained cries currently filling the room from Boris's "office".

_And as you get back into line a mob jumps to their feet_

God damn this shit is fucked up.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

_Now dance, fucker, dance_

Somehow it seems this just gets less horrid every time he does it. I fear that one day I wont have anything left in me to scream out for ill be so used to it. Scary. Being used to being raped…it's not normal. Then again, this is Boris we're talking about. Nothing he does is normal. His punishments are cruel and unusual. 110% illegal. The rough stone floor scrapes at my back and it hurts but that's nothing compared to the knife cutting my side and the raw, way-too-hard thrusts.

_Man, he never had a chance and no one even knew_

Squeezing my eyes shut tight I almost pray for a sudden death. Not for myself. No. I have yet too much to live for outside these walls. I pray for Boris's sudden death. As disgusting as it would be if he died right now, I'd be oh so relieved. And I know everyone else would be too. Trying to lessen the hurt, I picture Tala, smiling at me and telling me one day, _'we're gonna get the fuck out of here'_. But then the hurt is back. I almost feel like im betraying him in some sick way.

_It was really only you_

Maybe I **should **just wish for my own death.

It's coming fast anyway.

Why try and avoid the inevitable?

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

_With a thousand lies and a good disguise_

Ian stared into the small mirror in the infirmary, glancing over himself. Short but growing taller as the weeks wore on. Average in weight, but getting skinnier. Letting out a sigh of disapproval, Ian grabbed the hem of his shirt and lifted it up to check out the damage. Like Bryan, he too had his own ways of dealing with Boris. Twenty or so semi-deep cuts of varying length criss-crossed over his stomach and down his hips.

_Hit 'em right between the eyes_

Running a finger lightly over one of the older ones, Ian glanced around before his eyes landed on a razor used for cutting the thicker bandages. Without even a moments thought or a second of hesitation, he pressed the blade to an untouched bit of flesh and forced it in. Leaning against the wall for support, not a sound left him. Not a tear fell though they threatened to make an appearance. And as the smallest of content smiles crossed him, Ian removed the blade and allowed the dark red blood to seep down across the older scars.

_When you walk away, Nothing more to say_

Cleaning up all evidence of his pain, Ian retreated to find his teammates.

_See the lightning in your eyes_

Hey. Who had to know?

_See 'em running for their lives_

**TBC….**

**A/N: I don't think this was as sad as previous chapters : | that kind of upsets me. Please read and review.**


	6. Chapter 5

**A/N: **alright. You guys love me yes? (puppy pout) if you don't then ignore this. If you DO, I will forever be your slave if you let your friends/fans/family/pets/local hobos know about my profile here on the lovely ='D it would mean the world and a bucket of chicken wings if you guys did that for me.

**Annoying talking animal::: **everyone who read the last chapter said it was disturbing xD it made me have a huge giggle fit

**FuriousFanny::: **and I are glad you like this story =D thank you very much!

**SilentPandemonium::: **thank you very very much! :3

**Warnings: **Shounen-Ai/Angst

**Disclaimer**: I do not own Beyblade or any of its characters. I also do not own the opening poem. It was written by a girl named Allison at the CaringOnline website.

**Not Normal - Chapter 5**

_Eating away at me  
there is a Pain  
Feeding on my agony  
a breeding parasite prevails  
It gnaws away my insides  
taunts me with its strength  
acid burning up, a flare up of self hate  
a constant reminder of the core weakness in me  
Decisions to be made  
are chosen by the Pain  
no control do I have over its actions  
its grasp is too strong for me to throw off  
I cannot move  
only to tremble and shake  
the Pain is back  
I am eaten away_

_- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -_

He still wakes up in the night, shaking and crying. I still hold him close.

He still cries when he thinks nobody is listening. I still watch from the doorway, scared to help.

He still won't admit that he too is dying. I still won't let this happen.

On our own we are weak. We are nothing. On our own Boris has the ability to take us, rape us, mind fuck us, torture us in every way in and out of the imaginable. But if the four of us are together….well, there isn't a thing in heaven, on earth or in hell that he can do to hurt us. Not a thing. Like they say, together we stand, divided we fall. Closer than a PB+J sandwich made out of squished pieces of bread, we've always been like an iron wall together. Strong. Able to fight back (to an extent). Always able to somehow dodge the inevitable. The four of us. Brothers. Friends. Lovers. Secret crushes. Family. The four of us…..it's sad to think that sooner rather than later, I just might be alone.

Bryan can try and hide it all he wants. He has a problem. He is sick. He knows this. He won't let us help. But most of all, he won't let Tala help. Tala is going out of his mind worrying day in and day out about Bryan. He too is falling ill. And Ian…fuck. Just….

**Fuck.**

When he stretches out on his back every night before falling asleep, I almost allow myself the smallest glance at his perfect stomach. I really can't help it. But last night I got the smallest glance of what I never thought I'd see. Cuts. Dozens of them littered across his once-perfect stomach.

_I almost cried._

Me. Big, strong Spencer.

And I fucking almost _**cried.**_

What used to be the ever avoidable inevitable has now become the ever charging inevitable. There is no way for us to dodge it anymore. If it's coming, it's coming. Nothing but a miracle and some pixie dust is going to change things now. Boris started this train on the tracks long ago. On the tracks he knew would come to an end. The end. Where in all the movies the rails have been broken and now the ever speeding train is heading on a one way ticket to the edge of the cliff. The train drives right off the edge. Everyone dies. Except quite possibly one person.

If this train isn't slowed, I'm going to be that one person.

That one, pathetic, human who's going to need therapy for the rest of his life because the only three peple in his life who meant a god damn thing to him were driven off a cliff and died. Died a painful, fiery, explosive death right before his eyes.

My eyes.

They've seen so much here.

Wounds.

Tears.

Disorders.

Cuts.

_**Cutting.**_

Of all the things I will see if my life, I hope to God my best friends deaths are not on that list.

I hope to God Ian's death is not on that list.

**TBC….**

**A/N: I have a pudding cup!! ='D please read and review**


	7. Chapter 6

**A/N:** happy Halloween everyone!!! BTW I went trick-or-treating and it was super funny. I was an army soldier and my sister was a pro-wrestler and my fran Midnite was a serial killer xD

**Annoying talking animal::: **Dx it does doesn't it? But that doesn't mean it is

**FuriousFanny:: **I like your rambly reviews xD if I didn't make the author notes funny, I'd probably end up getting sad writing the chapters ; _ ;

**Warnings: **Shounen-Ai/Angst

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Beyblade or any of its characters

**Not Normal - Chapter 6**

What was left of our sanity has just left the building.

What am I talking about? I'm talking about Spencer. Over all these years he's been like the rock. The one object of stability amongst the rest of us slowly loosing it. He's never gone mad. He's never thrown a fit. He's never had a disorder nor has he ever been depressed. Those problems were reserved for us. Spencer was simply there to reassure us everything was going to be alright, even if it wasn't put us back together again when we were broken. He's the only reason any of us have stayed sane as long as we have. Even with Bryan falling mentally and physically ill and myself following suit unintentionally (due to stress the nurse said)…he remained calm, cool, collected and perfectly sane. Perfectly okay. And still very perfectly our stability. That is…until he found out something nobody saw coming. Especially not us.

Ian has always been the second most sane. Sure he's always enjoyed blowing stuff up, but what normal Russian boy doesn't enjoy that? Other than some late nights after getting severely punished by Boris, Ian has never showed true sadness. Certainly not anything along the lines of depression. So if someone is smiling and carrying on with life like normal on the outside…how are you to know what they're suffering from on the inside? How were we to know what Ian was dealing with or **how** exactly he was dealing with it? Even in those moments when he almost looked unhappy, I never once thought to myself_ 'maybe something's wrong'._ I just figured HEY, we're in the fucking abbey. Who wouldn't be a little upset about that fact?

Anyway…Spencer. Our rock. Our one sane mind. Lost it the day he found out Ian's biggest addiction. Have you ever seen a six foot something guy start throwing furniture around? Have you ever been in the line of fire while he's throwing furniture? It's a rather scary thing. He seemed so fine. Bryan and I were curled up together on the floor simply talking. Ian was gone at the infirmary again. Sad he wasn't feeling well. And then…out of nowhere….Spencer just lost it. Maybe he'd been thinking about it the whole time he'd been sitting there, but it came as a surprise to us.

And that was when he raced off. We didn't find out until later why.

He had run in and stole a kitchen knife from the staff and before anyone could stop him he cut himself up pretty bad.

Why?

_**"As long as Ian's doing it, I'm doing it too!"**_

That jaw dropping statement brought on a whole new world of hurt from Boris.

But Spencer wasn't the victim.

No.

Boris went straight for Ian.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Leaning against the wall of the infirmary, razor pressed in deep, grin in place. I never expected the door to burst open suddenly. I never expected Boris to come in. Nor did I expect to find myself on my back seconds later.

"Punishing yourself now are we, Ian?" he all but growled. I shuddered. His mouth was a little too close to my own for my liking.

"N-no."

"Really now? A little birdie told me you have a…a problem of sorts." Boris said, smirking as he fingered the blade still lodged in my stomach. Gasping in sheer pain, I tried to wriggle away.

"W-what birdie?"

He pulled the blade out slowly, before ramming it back in. I bit my tongue, fighting back giving him what he wanted most: proof that he was winning.

"Spencer."

Wait…Spencer? My brain froze. My limbs locked.

Spencer knew?

Spencer **knows.**

Spencer told Boris.

"I-if he really k-knew," I gasped out as he pushed the blade in deeper, "he wouldn't t-tell you!"

"He didn't have to. The fact that he admitted you're the very reason he's now covered in cuts was enough admission that you too have this little…problem." he accented the last word, licking my lips. I jerked back, smacking my head on the hard floor.

Spencer……cuts? No. Boris has to be lying. Spencer wouldn't do that.

_Spencer isn't stupid._

_Spencer is fine. Normal. __**Sane.**_

**Spencer isn't like me.**

**TBC…**

**A/N: chocolate is amazing!! I love Halloween 8'D please read and review!!!!**


	8. Chapter 7

**A/N: **I need to get off mah lazy ass and write something Dx so here it goes. Just for you guys. AND RANDOM A/N FOR THE DAY::: I watched this Beyblade/Lord of the Rings trailer on you tube (and downloaded it to my ipod BTW) and it made me want to watch the LotR trilogy for the first time ever. And so…I did. I have finished the first two movies and am now halfway done with the third and I have to say I now make way more Lord of the Rings references than a person should.

**Annoying talking animal::: **there just might be, but I still need to torture everyone for a while =D

**FuriousFanny:::: **indeed you must. And that is exactly why im updating!! HOHO!

**Warnings**: this story is so angsty one might feel incredibly sad afterwards. If you do, find Frodo and hug him. He will make your day fantastic xD

**Disclaimer**: I do not own Beyblade or any of its characters.

**Not Normal - Chapter 7**

It's dark.

It's cold.

It's cramped.

My prison.

What did I do to deserve this?

'_Spencer. It's all spencers fault. If he hadn't gone and run his mouth off-'_

"No." whispering to the voice overtaking my mind, I try to get slightly more comfortable in this room. Ha. Room. it's more like a hallway cleaning-supplies closet. This voice in my head keeps trying to get me to believe this is all Spencers fault. But im still smarter than that. I'm sure he never meant for this to happen.

'_keep telling yourself that, Ian. He wanted you to be locked away'_

"Right. And I'm the King."

"Are you now?"

My head snapped up and I stared at the door. A small window towards the top of it allowed me to see the face of the REAL reason I'm now sitting on my ass in a cramped prison cell in the basement.

"Boris.." it came out as a whine and he laughed. That laugh. Shivering, I tried to curl up away from the door. _No. No. Not today. Not now. I still hurt from earlier. Please…please_…

"No." I whimpered but like every day before, he ignored it. He ignored me.

'_after all, this is what you deserve.'_

"N-no."

* * *

So much is changing. Whether it be for the good or for the bad I don't know…all I know is things aren't the same anymore. Even with being in the abbey, at least once upon a time we could smile. We could spend our free time laughing, talking. We could feel something other than pain and despair. These days that's all we feel. There are no more smiles left in us. No more random bouts of laughter. No more jokes. What we have now are endless days and endless nights. Reoccurring nightmares and the pain of having to face each day alone. Because that's what we are. Alone. No longer are the four of us together. With our own private demons eating us from the inside out and Boris finally taking control, we can no longer be together. Yet the pain goes on. Even with Bryan down to 85 pounds, Boris still rapes him. Even with Ian being locked away in a small room in the basement of the abbey, Boris still harasses him. Spencer spends his nights and his days awake, because if he were to fall asleep, his dreams would surely devour all that's left of him. And I, Tala Ivanov, sit here and think and pity. Because if I don't, who will? No one. That's who.

It's been almost a whole two weeks since Spencer lost it and Ian got locked away. For life, Boris said. The chances of Ian being alive the next time we see him are slim to none. Infact, the next time we see him it'll probably be at his funeral. If Boris lets him have one that is…

Sitting here thinking, pitying and pondering….I have to wonder what we did to get here.

I know I'm here because I'm a burden to everyone. My mother…my father. I deserve this.

I know Bryan is here because he ran from home. He ran from something bad right into something even worse.

But Spencer and Ian…

Two of the sweetest people I used to know….

What did they do to deserve this?

Probably nothing.

But then…that's the world live in isn't it?

A world where the guilty get punished and the innocent get punished even worse.

Laying down but with no intention of falling asleep, I close my eyes and picture those innocent kids walking in to the abbey for the very first time because their parents signed them up and knowing that they don't know what they're in for and knowing that each and every one will probably grow up to be just like us….if I had a religion, I would pray for them.

Their parents send them here for training…educating.

But the only thing here for them is pain.

And maybe one day?

**Death.**

_It's knocking._

**And we have no choice but to open the door.**

**TBC….**

**A/N: uh….this has to be one of the worst chapters yet. The phone kept ringing here and it was throwing me off my depressed mindset (the mindset I need to write this story) so…I think it may have ruined this. But please read and review anyway. **


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